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Reconnecting With A Returning Loved One

Updated: Oct 20, 2021



Full transcript from interview with Rosanne Clausen. (July 29, 2021)


Marcus: What's up, yeah. It's your boy, Marcus Bullock, the CEO, founder of Flik-

shop. I'm here for another episode of Marcus asks. I'm super excited about

this episode today, because now we get the chance to hear directly from

someone who had a loved one who was in prison. And now they're home.

And so, I'm super excited to join Rosanne. She's one of the founding

members of the strong prison wives and families, Facebook, and Instagram

groups. Her community that she has built is incredible. So, she's goanna be

joining us in any second. So, I'm excited about it. I see she's goanna jump

in now. So, I'm goanna let her in. I'm super excited to compensate me by

my air pods to make sure you're behaving well. Hi, there she is.


Rosanne: Hi, Marcus


Marcus: How are you? Let me just make sure you guys can see me.


Rosanne: I'm great. Do you see me? Okay, I'm great. I'm great. How are you?


Marcus: You're perfect. I can see you. Well, I can't hear you. Well, you're good to

go. This is goanna be awesome. I'm so pumped to have you join us. Thank

you so much for joining me for


Rosanne: Of course, I'm so happy to be here, connected to you again and see

everybody hopping on. This is so exciting.


Marcus: This is goanna be so much fun. One of the things I think that I enjoy the

most about this journey is connecting with people who I never would have

had the opportunity to be able to connect with and you are one of them.

Look, we're goanna jump straight in. I want to go straight into the

conversation, right? Because you know, everybody here they really here

for you. And they are really here to hear. Everybody here to hear you and

I'm so pumped about that. But before I jump in, I want to take a quick

second because I don't do intros. How would you introduce yourself?


Rosanne: I would say, well, I am Rosanne Clausen. I am the founder of the nonprofit

strong prison wives and families. My husband was formerly incarcerated

to 213 years. He was incarcerated under stacked mandatory minimum

sentencing was. How long do I have for this intro.? I could go on for days.

But he was awarded compassionate release. Just about a year ago on

August 12, 2020. We moved out to Las Vegas. I'm sure we will get into all

of that throughout this conversation. But in a nutshell, we were awarded

that, move to Vegas, had a baby two weeks ago. It's just been amazing.


Marcus: Oh, my goodness. I'm so excited to talk about all of this stuff here. First of

all, say congratulations again.


Rosanne: Thank you!


Marcus: On the new. I felt now you're like very newly, like this just happened.


Rosanne: This just happened. Yes. If you could see with the bags under my eyes.

We're getting up at night, but it's. Oh, perfect. I love that. good lighting.

Thank you so much. It's like I keep telling everyone it is the best most

beautiful whirlwind I've ever experienced in my life. You know you have

kids.


Marcus: I love it. Thank you so much for all your always your transparency here. I'm

goanna be actually so let's I want to jump in. So, Adam is your husband,

Adam is amazing. I met Adam, you know, for the first time of a couple of

months ago. And since our very first conversation, I'm like, oh man, like

Adam, you're the homie now. So, I'm excited about our meeting Adam and

knowing you personally, but I've been following probably not you

specifically, but one of your groups for quite some time. The strong prison

wives and families. Tell me why did you start that? Why? Why did why did

you start that? That group?


Rosanne: Yeah. So, when I got back in touch with Adam, he was already incarcerated

for nine years. And like I said he was a lifer. And it was (Inaudible/03:40)

three other prison wives and family members couldn't understand why I

was doing what I was doing. Not only why I was getting back in touch and

involved in this relationship with somebody (Inaudible/03:56) ever. Am I

freezing? Am I okay?


Marcus: No, no, you're good. You're good.


Rosanne: Okay. Okay, good. So, everywhere I turned, nobody understood. I started

getting anxiety about it. I didn't want to talk about my relationship

anymore. And it was like this awkward period, plus all these questions I

was trying to go to visit, I didn't know what I could wear. I didn't know what

I can mail to him. I didn't know if I could bring anything, so many things

that were up in the air. So, I figured if I don't have support, either by

people, or people who were involved in this life, I'm goanna go find it. And

I started to search online and at the time, this was what I think around

when you started 2008, 2009. I found nothing and the few things that were

out there at the time. I felt live to a stigma that a lot of people think about

prison wives and girlfriends and family members. That was kind of off and,

you know, people felt like it seemed like at the time, people were just

glorifying the criminal lifestyle. And they couldn't wait to get their loved

one home. So, he could hit the street again, or she could hit the street

again. And they could be Bonnie and Clyde and ride or die and all of those

other cliches. And I thought, man, but we can do so much better than this.

And if it's not out there, I'm going to create it because we need support,

we need people who understand us. And so, I started a blog at that point,

actually, started my YouTube channel. And I connected with this woman

who had a blog that was called at the time strong prison wives? And we

started it a Facebook page, and we started all of our social media, and it

was growing ridiculously, like at the time, that wasn't like the tip top

generation now where you go viral in five minutes, and you have a million

subscribers. But at that time, it was 500, 1000 members a day, which was

huge.


Marcus: Massive, like


Rosanne: Massive back then. Yeah. And so, we just kept going, and I incorporated as

a nonprofit, and it's just kind of the rest is history. But it just speaks to how

much support is needed for loved ones of the incarcerated.


Marcus: Yeah, I mean, this is amazing. One of the things that, you know, one of the

things I noticed when I first heard about you all, was the community that

you get that you guys were continuing to build. When we first launched

Flikshop. We launched Flikshop; we went live in app stores around

2012.And you guys are like literally our first customers. Right? And that was

I mean, think about how long ago that was. And you're right like it not only

were there not a bunch of groups like this or a conversation that are being

had. But the reality of it is that the conversation around criminal justice

reform or the conversations around preparing people for reentry, none of

those were happening yet.


Rosanne: Yep.


Marcus: Like that was like back in the day before anyone was jumping on that kind

of storyline. And so, you were like, very innovative during that journey.

Don't have time when people weren't like talking about this kind of thing.

And like supporting, especially women who are like saying, I'm going to

stand up and be and be heard and be felt and build this community around

me to say like, it's okay to love someone that's still incarcerated. And not

only so it's okay to love them. But I'm going to love on them hard. And I'm

going to show them that I'm there for them the entire journey. Like that

was completely new and innovative back then. I mean, it had had been

scary for you at that time. And I'm wondering, like, what were other people

saying, were they saying like, why are you supporting this guy? He's in

prison and blah, blah. I mean, I can only imagine what you were hearing at

that time.


Rosanne: Yeah, like, at best people were nice to my face and whispered behind my

back. Worst people. But worse than that, people would just say the most

cruel things. And I'm like, why would you say this to me? You wouldn't say

that to somebody else. But I guess because he was in prison. In their head,

it was validation to say the nastiest thing. Like, it was one thing to say mean

things about me where you're desperate, you're dateless, you're goanna

wind up an old miserable hag. You deserve to be like, the worst I've ever

heard was. He deserves every year, those 213 years, and he deserves to

die in there. And you deserve to die too. Because you support him.


Marcus: Oh, my goodness.


Rosanne: Yeah. Like, who are you? And why would you judge my life. And a lot of

times, it was just the people.


Marcus: These people knew you or didn't know you?


Rosanne: Both, but I think that the hardest part was the people that did know me,

people that don't know me, you can write it off, you're just a jerk. But

people that did know me, I had to start telling myself and this is huge

lesson that I've always coached other prison wives and family members

through when it's your family or people that you love, you just kind of have

to take steps back and realize they want what they think is best for you,

and their version of your happiest life. So, in their heads, a lot of people

can't understand why you would dedicate your life to somebody who's in

prison, especially a long term or a life or even if you're young, and he has

5, 7, 10, even 2 years, it's a lot of time from 20 to 22, to dedicate your life

to somebody.


Marcus: Yeah


Rosanne: So, they say these awful things. And I always tell people, just remember,

you have to set boundaries and say like, I get it, they're saying it because

they love me. But if you're goanna say to my face, I'm going to leave or I'm

going to do X, Y, and Z and then stick to those boundaries, but know that

they're doing it out of love most of the time.


Marcus: That's interesting that you have that perspective. I love that you introduce

love, even in that conversation, right? I mean, obviously that your

relationship is guided by love. I mean, this tremendous sacrifice that you

make in order to be able to be there to support someone who's

incarcerated. Obviously, that's an extreme level of love that I think that

most people, like most of you just probably wouldn't understand until your

loved one is the one that's in that role. And you're like, wait, no, this is not

as hard as you think it is. Right? Like, I love them no matter where they live.

And I think that's one of the interesting things about. I want to kind of come

back to one of the things that you mentioned about the difference

between the people who didn't know you and the people who don't know

you. That kind of sort of stuck out to me like the difference between the

wo and how you can kind of sort of shrug off those who do not. I want to

go back to the people who do know you? Right? Your family members who

are the closest to you, the folks who know you in your community, the

people who know you at work, like all of those places. Well, how did they

I mean, the people that were closest to you're not talking to like people

like, oh, I know who really is right. But like,


Rosanne: Yeah


Marcus: Who were close to you? How did they feel about your decision to be able

to be there to support Adam along this journey?


Rosanne: Most of them couldn't understand it. And Adam's story was so unique

because he's a (Inaudible/10:24), how many people you had to do all of

these horrible things, in order to wind up with 213-year sentence. So once

I explained it to them, it was tough in the beginning, and I'm talking about

very close, like family, it was very, very tough. And I fought it out because

you know how we are, especially for our men, and we're goanna fight hard.

And I had the worst fight I ever had with. It was my four sisters and my best

friend who I've known since I was seven years old. So, she's like my sister.

And she was nine months pregnant at the time, and I said some cruel, nasty

things. And that's how we're wired. I kind of came up with this whole

theory that I was talking about, it's out of love. And then once we had a

little battle, and we fought it out, and everybody had a breather, then we

came back and we talked through it, and they realized, okay, he's not going

anywhere. We set our piece. She set her piece, now we have to figure it

out. And I wound up trying to connect them with Adam. Get them on calls.

I tried to get them out to visit but he was six hours away. So, it was kind of

hard, but Flikshop, all of that stuff helped them build relationships and

mend it. And then they were his biggest supporters in the long run. It took

a minute, but it worked out.


Marcus: Yeah, yeah. Now, I mean, that's interesting. I mean, to see how you're

sacrificing your consistency, it transfers over time. People like, they get it

eventually.


Rosanne: Yeah


Marcus: They come on the wagon as well. It's interesting. I will, I'm pretty certain

how I know how Adam would answer this next question. But I'm curious to

how you would address this question. in your own words. How do you

think that your relationship impacted Adam's reentry? Like, how does

having a relationship with you along the journey, and then coming home

to a wife, you know, a woman who loves him and is there for them? How

did that impact him? What did you see? How did you see that?


Rosanne: He said, it was unbelievable, and he's so sweet. And he credits me for a lot

of making his transition. It wasn't easy, but as easy as possible, because I

was here to help him with some of the emotional stuff which he prepared

himself for years. He never lived like a lifer. People thought he was crazy.

People thought I was crazy because we always talk about this outdate and

getting married because we weren't legally met. We still aren't legally

married and having children and all this stuff. And they're like, okay, you

two cuckoos. But we always kept each other and gave each other, kept

each other hopeful. And so, when he came home, and he had me to help

him emotionally, and then with things that we don't think about

technology, he had never seen a touchscreen, telephone cell phone. So

stuff like that, just to help him, I drove him everywhere until he got his

license just made it so much easier. And he always said that I was his

inspiration. You know how people always say no, your why. I was always

his why. And now our baby work is why to stay out to (Inaudible/13:15)

back but to stay positive, to fight through all of this stuff that they put the

obstacles that they put in your way when you're returning. And just

getting them through.


Marcus: Yeah. What are some of the things that you did to help prepare for him to

come like when you knew like we as our day, he's going to be coming

home, you know, what did you do? What are some things you did to

prepare for that?


Rosanne: He was totally prepared. I was the biggest in denial that he used to get

upset with me. He's like, I need you to do this. And he would send me stuff

over email. But it was hard, right? Because I'm living in New Jersey. He's in

Pennsylvania, and we're moving to Vegas, if and when he comes home. So

he's like, look at properties. How am I going to buy a house when I'm like?

I don't know when I'm going to move in if I'm going to move in. So, I just

kind of denied the whole thing. But he was so prepared. He had multiple

jobs lined up. Before he got out. We had kind of a place to say we knew

about where we were going. We do Dodo birds. I had my whole car pack

with what I put in there when I picked him up and drove across country

and got a place to live literally on the drive. But that's because we couldn't

prepare he was awarded immediate release. So, it's not like, okay, you're

resentenced, and you have three years or even three months. It was you

have two days to get out of here. But he was really good. That's a

conversation you guys should have because I did nothing.


Marcus: I'm excited about having that conversation. Well, let me ask

you how is this experience was interesting, right? I mean, I think about

some of the things that I've gone through in my life, and you know, those

who don't know I serve eight years in prison myself which is the reason

why I launched Flikshop and because I understand the family dynamic and

the importance of the value of keeping that families connected along that

journey. And we want to be able to do that with our mobile apps. But I also

know that having an experience, interestingly enough, it showed me how

to build resilience and prepared me and allow me to be able, to be the

stronger one that kind of sort of pushed through a lot of the experiences

that I have out here. Now, as a result of like the pain tolerance I have,

because of experience I had, you know, while doing time in prison, and so

I think that's one of the interesting things that happened to me. But one of

the things I'm wondering is like how that experience some kind of

resilience that built for my mom, or like for my sister, or the people who

love me, like how they think about wanting to bring me home every day

and how they couldn't, it was nothing they could do, to help, you know,

accelerate their process. And my situation. And I think that it's interesting,

because you assess pain different, when you go through these different

periods in life that are like, super, super, super painful, right? It's like, once

you fall off the bike the first time, if you fall off again, like I'm not cool lad,

(Inaudible/16:00) bike before this, like it's nothing right? But the fear of

falling off for the first time is where all of the anxiety comes from. One of

the things I wonder again, about the family members or how

incarceration affects the families; I'm wondering how these adverse

situations help impact the rest of your life in other scenarios, specifically,

things that are hard or challenging, like a great example for you as a new

parent is like, is motherhood, right. I think it's a very interesting thing that

you really can't believe a pair for. Right? So do you think that these life's

experiences that you had, especially with dealing with Adam, they helped

prepare you for other things in your life? Did you learn something during

this journey, that transfer and like you build up some resilience or some

grit from this journey that you know, goes into something else in your life.


Rosanne: Oh, my gosh, 100%, absolutely. And I love that you use the term pain

tolerance, because I would never think to kind of convert that from

emotional to physical, but it's so true. So, and I love that you use grit

because Adam and I talk about being gritty constantly. And I didn't realize

that something I thought you were born with it. Either you have it or you

don't. And that's it. And I didn't realize it's something that you can build up

over time. Absolutely. So, when I first got back in touch with Adam in 2009,

there was nothing, absolutely nothing legally, all of his appeals were done,

exhausted, no possibility of parole or anything like that. So, it was all going

on Whoa, 2011, a bill was introduced, we all got all excited, I'm like, this is

it, he's coming home, he's goanna be home before I'm 35. It was quite a

few years ago, but he's goanna be home by this day, I'm goanna be this

age, and you're on this emotional high, and boom, it crashes, it's dead. And

all of your emotions go through the floor. And this happened with so many

different bills, with clemency with different appeals and looking through

the court and you go up, and you're like, this is it and then you crash. And

when you're crashing, you're like, I don't know if I could do this anymore.

This is the most pain I've ever felt in my whole entire life. There were times

it was, I don't apply for clemency in 2016, when it was that big push to get

a whole bunch of people out, what they would do was they would release

a list of names that were approved. And you would hear that a list came

through the grapevine that we'd have to find the list, find all the names.

And it would be like this high. Okay, list was I see some of my girls on here.

And I would text a lot of them and be like, oh, this was just released, and

we would all go try to find it, we would find it and then one of us would

find his name wasn't on it, they would have to try to tell me it would be

crushing. And it would crash. So, this happened and then a denied list for

came out, will come out and you would hold your breath and be like, I hope

he's not on there. Same scenario. Just backwards, opposite. And finally, the

day before the inauguration, new presidents coming in. This is all going to

be over. I get word that Adams petition is on the Vice President's desk. So

I'm like, Oh, that's it. It's happening. Next day, no aggression. It's all

happening. I'm at a doctor's appointment. I'm watching it. I'm like, Oh, it's

all over. Like this is it. It's done. It's not happening. It just we ran out of

time. So, I'm trying to have small talk conversation with the girls at the desk

talking about her outfit is adorable. Look at this one. Meanwhile, in the

back of my head, I'm crushed. I'm trying not to cry. And this lasted for

probably six weeks, I will be at my desk at work and just spontaneously

tears, I would have to run to the bathroom and just kind of get it out or I

would be now following up for my surgery. I'd be in the waiting room with

a doctor's appointment and tears, right because now it's all over. And

again, this happened throughout. You are right, you just build up this

resilience where you're like, Okay, it's bad. It's hard, hardest thing I've ever

had to go through. I'm goanna reassess. Do I want to keep going or am I

dumped this point? Can I not do this anymore? And every night I'd go to

bed. Every night this happened, I would go to bed and say, I don't know. I'll

wake up in the morning. I'll figure it out and your love is so strong. When

you wake up in the morning. You're like okay, I got this. And you're right.

It's just like a pain. And it did transfer into other areas of my life with not

only emotionally but physically, I had a baby three weeks ago, I had no idea

I was on labor, I just felt nothing. People don't believe me. But of course,

it's a little bit different. I mean, I've been working out for many, many

years. But you just learn. You just you develop that grit that I don't think

other people that weren't in your position, my position, the other people's

positions that are watching this, to get through and figure it out.


Marcus: I think that's such an interesting thing, right? Like, it's like one of the silvers

linings in the dark cloud that you never really think about. And I think that

it's. I'm glad that you talked about the other people that are watching,

right, because the family members, they don't know that they're building

up this pain tolerance while you're going through it. Like you have no idea

that you're doing these emotional or like what I call mental pushups,

you're going these emotional pushups, these mental pushups during this

journey, right and your , your resilience is getting stronger and stronger,

and your grit is getting stronger and stronger. And every time you got to

accept a collect call, every time you have to go into a visiting room and you

get patted down or whenever you get that letter in the mail or any of those

things. right? Like they're like the relief moments, we get a chance to

breathe a little bit and whoa, I feel the benefit of the muscles that I'm

flexing right now. But it is. It's like a mental emotional workout. But I'm

interested. I'm fascinated about that. And it's very interesting to hear that,

even for the family members that work out, it transfers into your lives,

other phases of your life as well. So, thank you so much for hitting on that.

One of the questions I have, especially because we have so many of the

women that you support, that are watching this, that are watching this live

right now. One of the questions I have for you is what you see, what do

you remember seeing as like, one of the things that you heard the most as

like one of the ailments or problems or issues that wives or women

specifically had with their loved ones that were incarcerated. But you see

a lot of stuff like a trend coming in your inbox or your dm saying, Hey, we

need to know more about this. Was there a thing that you think that like

most people like wanting to know about, learn about hear about your

experiences?


Rosanne: Sure. And in different areas for different things. So, the biggest trend, as

far as on the outside, not dealing with, let's say visits or their loved ones or

anything like that would be a lot of people need mental health services.

And I don't have them to offer yet. Hopefully one day, a lot of people need

legal help. I don't have lawyers or anything like that. So, we'll do the best

we can and say hey, you know this such and such is going through an

appeal in the state of Georgia, why don't you reach out to her and see if

maybe she can give you some tips on how to write that letter, those types

of things, then, of course, it's a huge trend. Just emotional. I need support.

I have nobody on the outside. Like I was saying earlier, the whole reason

why I developed strong prison wives and families, nobody understands me.

People are nasty to my face, that type of stuff. And then as far as kind of

logistics, what do I wear to visit? Is anybody else going to visit that could

give me a ride, those types of things?


Marcus: What do you typically tell people when you're in a box, you are answering

these kinds of questions like it's specifically like these, some of these kinds

of things? What do you tell people they're like, emotionally I'm going

through a right now I have no idea how to make it through the event? Like

what do you tell someone when it happened?


Rosanne: So, I have these little like, rules that I set up for myself that I pass along to

other people. And I started like I told you, I started on YouTube. So, I have

a library of videos on there where I shared all this stuff. It's grown out of

costs, and for anybody that wants to check it out.


Marcus: You will give it. We will tell these new moms like these moms, these

women, like when they go through these emotional moments at the

middle of the night when they like I don't know what to do, how to

emotionally get to it.


Rosanne: Right. Okay, so I have these rules, right. So, the biggest one that I share

with strong prison wives and families now, everybody does it is we call it

the 24-hour rule where something bad happens, you're having an

emotional night, you know, you see your ex on the street, you don't know

if you want to go back to those types of things. 24 hours, you have 24 hours

to feel your feelings, you're not going to push them down because you're

not going to avoid them. Because eventually they're going to come up

anyway. You need to feel them. So, you've 24 hours you can call out of

work. You can eat Doritos and lay on the couch. You can watch Netflix. You

could do whatever it is that you need to do to wallow, to feel that pain to

cry. 24 hours later, I want you to wake up. I want you to go into work. I

want you to put on your sneakers and go for a run and better thing. You

need to get back into life and live it because here's the thing. When you go

back into life, 24 hours later, the sun's not going to automatically come out.

Everything's not going to automatically be better. But you're just kind of

going through the emotions and one day it will get better. But if you sit

there and lay under the covers and you will not get out of bed for day after

day after day, that's goanna progress and you are goanna fall deeper, and

deeper and deeper into that hole. It's going to be more difficult to pull

yourself out of it. So those little tidbits, but that's been my biggest one is

the 24-hour rule. It has gotten myself through. It's gotten so many of our

strong prison wives and family’s members through.


Marcus: We're goanna hit this one, again, you guys see that, the 24-hour rule. Thank

you so much. That was an amazing tip. You guys’ goanna hit that one again

on repeat over and over again, on Flikshop's page. I think that was great

advice. And I'm grateful to you for sharing it. Look before I let you go. I

mean, you're like a wealth of information. And I'm hoping that you're going

to be back. Hopefully, I get a chance when you do a Marcus asks episode

with both of you and Adam. So, I think that will be awesome to hear both

of you guys’ perspective on along this journey. I mean, this has been an

incredible journey that you guys have been on. And you've been extremely

transparent about it. And I'm so grateful because it helps so many people,

right. I mean, all of the men and women, that you support, the entire

family. So, I'm so excited. I saw even the growth of like strong prison wife

and now families, right. And so when I think about like how you guys add

support to this community. I'm super, super grateful. One last question I

have for you before I have let you go. What do you wish you knew when it

came to preparing for this relationship with Adam and Adam's release?


Rosanne: Oh, good question. So, what I wish I knew when it came to preparing for

the relationship was: Slow down, and you can't put a date on it. So, I was

joking before like when I'm 25, or whatever it was, because I said, I got

back in touch with Adam when I was 31. And I would say like, Okay, I'm

going to fix this, I'm going to be the one that finds the loophole in the law

to get him out. And of course, it's not the case. There are lawyers that do

that. But at the time, I would spend eight, nine hours on each day of the

weekend, Saturday, and Sunday, just researching trying to find a loophole

in the law. And then I would go to work, Monday through Friday, and I would do my thing, and then I would go back to researching. And it's d

raining. I wish that at that point, I knew that, leave that to the experts. Do

what you have to do and make yourself knowledgeable, but don't

stop living your life and making this relationship your whole entire life. I

had so many people tell me, well, he's in there. He's miserable. So, I have

to be miserable out here. I even had somebody tell me he's rotting in a jail

cell. So, I had to kind of give it to her straight like, does he have mesa? Is

his skin rotting off of his body. Like what do you mean, but let's just think

about what you're saying. He'll be okay. She'll be okay, who's ever the

person inside, it sucks. Frankly, it broke my heart every single day. If I sat

there and thought about Adam in chains, or in the hole or anything like

that, you can't do it to yourself, you're not in prison, you have to live your

life. So, I wish I had that advice in the beginning too. And then for his

release, he had such, really his release, we had so much help. So, we were

at such an advantage. I just want to be made it so known how grateful I am

for the help. But there were all of these roadblocks throughout the way.

So, he needed his driver's license, couldn't get his driver's license without

his social security card. But he couldn't get a social security card without

his driver's license. He, Thank God, had a job with a friend. If he didn't, he

needed a bank account, couldn't get a bank account without a job. Couldn't

get a job without a bank account. And it was all these circles that we were

spawning. And like I said, we were at such an advantage. And I was starting

to get frustrated. Not him. But I told him. I said I used to judge people all

the time that got out and went right back. But now I'm eating those words.

And I understand. I'm not saying it's right. But I understand why sometimes

people feel that they can only do that because you're getting all of these

roadblocks. You need to go get drug tested every day. But you don't have

to get there, that type of stuff. So just be patient and rely on your

resources. And for everybody on here that supports a loved one who's

incarcerated. You are gold to them for getting them through that and just

Patience, patience, patience.


Marcus: I love these rules. Like this is like the (Inaudible/29:03) according to the

chapter of Rome. Thank you so much for this evening. I'm super grateful

for you taking some time to be very transparent with us and being

supportive to the community of people who we all love. Listen, guys, if you

heard it here first. In another edition of Marcus asks, wrote in an incredible

job and she had three big things that I think that I heard. You may have

heard something different. The things that I heard was one, like what is the

24-hour rule to you. You have one day to kind of sort of wallow in your

moment. Give yourself some grace, validate your emotions, live through it

for tomorrow. Pick yourself back up. The second one that I heard was

continue to live your life. Your loved one is incarcerated but their skin isn’t

peeling off their body quite yet. So, they not writing in a sale? Don't torture

yourself by thinking about that all the time. Continue to be supportive, but

also live your life. And the third thing that I heard what she says. She said

it over and over again. I don't know if you realize how many times you use

the word patient. You talked about patience so many times with yourself,

with your emotions, with Adam, even with the system and how you taught

learn patients and going through that up and down roller coaster of trying

to get him home. It's amazing what patients can do inside of our

relationships. And if we lead and guide with love, which I think is something

like the bonus thing that we'll talk a lot about this evening. But I think that

we all make it to this promised land where she has amazing family that she

couldn't have, you know, even thought about, I mean, they're living in a

space in an area where they didn't even know it was goanna happen. But

through faith and resilience and that same grit that we talked about

before, they made it here on the other end. This is another episode of

Marcus asks, Rosanne, thank you so, so, so much for joining us this evening.

I hope that you will also come back for the next future episodes of Marcus

asks. We will be having these kinds of conversations with the people in our

community that really, really matter. Rosanne, I appreciate you. Thank

you.


Rosanne: Marcus, thank you so much. Thank you so much for everything you do for

our community as well.


Marcus: I'm grateful. We'll see you next time Rosanne


Rosanne: Of course, Will do.

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